Complaining is a trait often labeled as unfavorable, whining, and hard to tolerate over time. However, complaining can be a healthy way to distress oneself when performed in the right way.
Needless to say, how a person complains and their follow-up actions can speak zillions regarding his or her personality. However, it is not so bad of a characteristic to complain.
I believed it wasn’t nice to do so, either.
So I wondered, what exactly makes the difference between creating an ambiance that is tolerable versus burdensome.
Complain just to let it all out
Like journaling, complaining can be a simple act of venting and letting go of things that keep us stuck. Henceforth, we move on with our life, not thinking of the stuff that has been bothering us.
The act is tricky since it requires the other person’s trust and safety (s) to whom we are venting our agony. No one likes to be judged and messed with the details shared.
Simultaneously, people who know how to let go of things that do not serve them can be outstanding at just complaining without getting obsessed with the concept.
In this regard, complaining serves as a moment where you scream and cry and then forget that event ever happened. It helps to release the energy that might be acting as resistance to your path to success.
Emptying the head of the aggression creates space to think forward. However, again, constant bickering on the same stuff will elevate the circumstance and not help.
Hence, complaining to talk and discuss for the moment without being obsessed by it can be a practical way of soothing oneself.
Complain to share and seek solutions
We complain because we either failed to achieve the result we wanted or we do not know how to deal with the situation.
Often, complaining is an act of expressing the tension and worry surrounding a particular topic.
Most of us do not realize that the constant bickering about a particular thing shows that we fail to accept the outcome we created. We do not know what to do next. Hence we go and try to share our experience with our close ones out loud.
Although, most people react and tag the person to behave negatively during these disturbed moments, this act can be beneficial when done with the presence of the right person.
The right people in our life, appropriate for that moment, can help us solve our problems. They will either provide direct solution or they will say something that will give a kick-start to the next step towards the solution.
Sharing the agony and worries is not a crime. Almost everyone does that, at the same time, everyone also does not like it. Maybe next time when we complain or someone else tries to share their sadness let’s show some compassion.
A reflection on our thoughts
As I was writing this section, I came across a podcast on Spotify titled Tiny Leaps, Big Changes by Gregg Clunis. Surprisingly he highlights the act of self-reflection while we are complaining in one of his episodes — which confirmed that my thoughts were somehow legit.
As we speak, we rewire our minds, and rewiring our minds generate thoughts that create our reality. We all know this by heart now, and if we don’t know, we do now.
Mindfully observing ourselves as we continuously brainstorm on a particular aspect of life can entail a lot about us and where we are heading.
This act is most likely hard since, in that agitated phase, it’s hard to perform mindful tasks since our minds are blowing apart.
However, when we know how to practice mindfulness, eventually we reach a stage where either via observing the responses of our surroundings or the events that might have repeatedly ignited the issue; we can self-reflect a lot.
Complain to read the other person
Challenging circumstances in our life can reveal a lot about ourselves as well as the people around us. Especially the ones we believe as close to us, and we tend to become dependent.
What the air of complaints can make is magic that recently I understood.
Understanding others’ emotions is a tough task, and so is being positively responsive to someone in a “not so good space.”
The act of complaint precisely can tell us whether the person with us is trustworthy, reliable, committed, understanding, and conclusive of our true self.
Most often than not, I have encountered conclusions or judgments derived based on my complaints, defining the person who I know I am not. But, the very event shows what’s going on in the other person’s head.
It is tough to be a listener in today’s world, especially with the uprising of self-love and narcissism.
Nevertheless, when done consciously, complaining, and venting sessions can reveal where we stand in our relationships with ourselves, others, and the problem.
Someone might say that noticing minute details in life can make it more complicated to survive. Which is true as well as well understood.
Nevertheless, with emotional maturity, I believe the ability to grasp the meaning behind individual actions arises.
We all do our best to survive, by controlling the wave of emotions we go through on a day-to-day basis. There will always be times when we will lift someone up and when we will need someone to lift us up.
Hence, changing our perspective to some of the traits that are in general difficult to deal with, may make it exciting and favorable.